Megan’s Resilience—and Why It Shouldn’t Be This Hard
This week, I want to continue our conversation about the realities of homelessness for women by highlighting the immense challenges single moms face as they try to juggle work, school, and childcare—all without the stability of a home.
When I think back on the many single mothers I've met doing outreach in New York City and New Jersey, one woman stands out as particularly resilient and resourceful. I met Megan in Harlem when I first started working with City Relief in 2011. At the time, she was living in a couples' shelter with her boyfriend, doing everything in her power to overcome years of addiction and homelessness. She started coming to our outreach regularly and quickly became close with several women on staff. One of them in particular really connected with Megan and invited her to go to church with her on the weekends and offered her the kind of support and friendship that all of us need at one time or another.
Then, everything changed.
Megan found out she was pregnant. She broke up with her partner, transferred into a different shelter while simultaneously detoxing herself from methadone—an extremely powerful medication used to manage opioid addiction—all while preparing for her newborn daughter with very little outside support. She found a program that offers administrative training for women, gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, and ultimately overcame every single obstacle that was thrown at her.
I can't overstate how difficult that is.
Megan graduated from her training program, worked on our fundraising team at City Relief for a season, and then found a career she’s passionate about as the Director of Development for The Hoving Home, a phenomenal organization that helps women rebuild their lives and step into their God-given purpose.
Megan's story is one of extraordinary resilience, but let me be clear: it shouldn't take extraordinary resilience just to survive!
Single mothers are forced to work exhausting hours, stretch every dollar, and navigate systemic barriers that make stability feel impossible. This is why poverty rates for single mothers are significantly higher than for the general population. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, 31% of single-mother households live in poverty, compared to just 5% of married-couple families. And for those experiencing homelessness, the numbers are even rougher—60% of homeless families are headed by single women.
This isn't just unfair. It's unacceptable.
We need more programs like the one Megan graduated from and we need to financially support more programs like The Hoving Home. We need more housing options that accommodate single moms and their children. More opportunities for them to pursue education, find meaningful work, and break the cycle of poverty. No mother should have to choose between paying rent and buying groceries, between staying in an unsafe situation or sleeping in a shelter.
Megan made it through. But so many women won't—unless we step up.
Let's be the kind of people who create real solutions, who support programs that empower women, and who refuse to look away from the struggles single moms face every single day. Because resilience shouldn’t be a requirement for survival.
With Gratitude,
Josiah Haken
City Relief, CEO
